But you're not alone, you are part of the Focus on Life community! I hope that somehow that is some consolation, I know it makes me feel better being surrounded by like minded creatives!
Donna, even the elements of this post prove you are not alone. It is thought provoking, very artistic and so true to your creativity which so many enjoy.
This is not meant to invalidate your feelings, but I feel like we can make a difference in each other's lives through this medium. Such a well though out post. Keep touching our hearts, Donna.
Ahhh, but you see, I am so totally alone. No family, just my daughter, no friends here locally aside from 1. I spend my days completely alone, day in and day out. I never thought my life would end up this way.
Donna, you are not alone - even if you feel so now. You have the communities (Focus on Life, the Facebook groups etc), you have your beautiful dogs (who love completely), you have your beautiful daughter. You need a human companion, maybe - in your local community is there anything you could do? A book club? Volunteering at the school once a week? teaching lampworking to budding artists or just curious minds? Maybe more interaction will change your point of view. I hope you feel the love and positive thoughts coming your way!
This is a very small close minded community in which I live. They don't welcome newcomers (I've been here 5 years). I don't want to meet a companion here. For one, I don't plan on staying here forever and 2nd, too much emphasis on alcohol consumption here. I don't want any part of that. My father was an alcoholic and so was my ex. I've lived in remote area's mostly alone with not much human contact. Guess I'm used to it. But still, it is lonley. I might as well be living remotely now. In fact, I wish I was remotely located in Alaska! :)
When I first moved to NYC I can remember this intense loneliness, which I thought was so odd since I lived with 14 million people. I think I always felt more lonely when I was around people I didn't connect with ... then to just be alone in nature. I prefer nature. But it is interesting that I have found this 'virtual' community of friends. People more like me. I do find comfort in that. We do all see the positive in you, and the amazing artist in you. But we are all friends and willing to listen as you need us
Donna, I admire you for not going the way of the locals with the alcohol consumption in order to make friends. You are a very talented woman and I hope that someday soon you will find your perfect place to settle and meet likeminded people. If you need to chat, I'm all ears!
Hi Donna. I too am alone. I understand your feelings. You are such a talented artist. I have admired your work for a long time. I hope you can find peace soon. I would like very much to be your friend.
It seems I've been slapping a smile on my face forever. People think I'm happy when inside I'm just dying. I have to portray that happiness and be positive all the time or my business would fail. I should be an actress, I'd win a grammy.
YOu have your dogs... with pets one is never truly alone! I live on a small island in the middle of nowhere... we came from away (3000 miles) we will never be from here... we will always live in so and so's house even though it looks nothing like their house... I have lived in small communites for the last 35 years where I wasn't appreciated you just have to grow a thick skin and bury yourself in work!
I am a loner by nature and love my alone time, but I do not know how I would handle it if I was alone all the time. I hear the pain in your post and it really proves that while our cyber friends are a caring community that we can share with, they cannot fill that sad feeling within. I do hope that you can find a solution as your creative talent is so incredible.
Donna, what can I say? I'd say you need to get out of the house, but you don't seem to like where you are. I'm very familiar with the idea of feeling like you are not going to stay somewhere and therefore not becoming a part of what's going on. But I think it's a mistake. And if you've been somewhere for five years- even if it's not your favorite place- I think you need to find a way to get out there. You know there have to be others around who feel the same way. As far as Alaska- is there a reason you can't just go there? A way you can make it happen? It kind of seems that you have determined that that is what will make you happier. In which case, I think you need to find a way to do it NOW. I hope you don't mind all of this- I'm kind of worried about you.....
You may be alone, but by reading the comments it sounds like you at least know who you are and what you want. That you are a strong person. That you have a sense of purpose. I believe that knowing yourself can be more important that knowing another, but I do hope you find what you are looking for.
I also live in a small community. It's very insular. I don't drive due to medical issues. I do have my husband but he works a lot. I find the internet to be a godsend since it does allow access to "conversation" with like minded people.
And the goats. Your dogs surely provide attention. I'm sure more than you want at time if I remember dogs :)
I'm sorry you are sad Donna. I hope that things will change for you sooner rather than later. Sometimes it is lonely even when you are in the same room with somebody. I've experienced that and I think it worse than being alone. It is my hope that you can manage to find some sort of community even if only on the internet. ~Ema
Thanks for the comments. I am a very private person, this took a lot for me to put out there. It's very difficult not having ANYONE in your life. I would love to find a companion so I could do things with someone. I long to hold hands with someone or just even feel another human touch or listen to another persons voice. Yeah, I have my dogs, they love unconditionally. Not the same as a human though. Regarding Alaska, t's not so easy to just pick up and move 3500 miles away. It cost 8 grand to do it last time. I do hope to move someplace within the next 2 years. Regarding "community" on the internet. I don't do that. I participate in no forums, use facebook mostly for promoting my work. The rest of the time I'm just working or doing something with my dogs. I'll be alright. I'm strong and I've survived many unpleasant life circumstances.
Donna - I get it and hope that you find a way to get the real Donna in tune with the public one. That might mean a move. It might mean meeting that companion. It might mean neither of those things. The journey must have some meaning though - or at least that's what I believe. I suspect your strength and this time is gaining you a lot of wisdom. Your work is showing your passion.
But you're not alone, you are part of the Focus on Life community! I hope that somehow that is some consolation, I know it makes me feel better being surrounded by like minded creatives!
ReplyDeleteDonna, even the elements of this post prove you are not alone. It is thought provoking, very artistic and so true to your creativity which so many enjoy.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry Donna. I only know you through our Focus on Life group but I think you're fascinating.
ReplyDeleteThis is not meant to invalidate your feelings, but I feel like we can make a difference in each other's lives through this medium. Such a well though out post. Keep touching our hearts, Donna.
ReplyDeleteAhhh, but you see, I am so totally alone. No family, just my daughter, no friends here locally aside from 1. I spend my days completely alone, day in and day out. I never thought my life would end up this way.
ReplyDeleteDonna, you are not alone - even if you feel so now. You have the communities (Focus on Life, the Facebook groups etc), you have your beautiful dogs (who love completely), you have your beautiful daughter. You need a human companion, maybe - in your local community is there anything you could do? A book club? Volunteering at the school once a week? teaching lampworking to budding artists or just curious minds? Maybe more interaction will change your point of view.
ReplyDeleteI hope you feel the love and positive thoughts coming your way!
This is a very small close minded community in which I live. They don't welcome newcomers (I've been here 5 years). I don't want to meet a companion here. For one, I don't plan on staying here forever and 2nd, too much emphasis on alcohol consumption here. I don't want any part of that. My father was an alcoholic and so was my ex. I've lived in remote area's mostly alone with not much human contact. Guess I'm used to it. But still, it is lonley. I might as well be living remotely now. In fact, I wish I was remotely located in Alaska! :)
ReplyDeleteWhen I first moved to NYC I can remember this intense loneliness, which I thought was so odd since I lived with 14 million people. I think I always felt more lonely when I was around people I didn't connect with ... then to just be alone in nature. I prefer nature. But it is interesting that I have found this 'virtual' community of friends. People more like me. I do find comfort in that. We do all see the positive in you, and the amazing artist in you. But we are all friends and willing to listen as you need us
ReplyDeleteDonna, I admire you for not going the way of the locals with the alcohol consumption in order to make friends. You are a very talented woman and I hope that someday soon you will find your perfect place to settle and meet likeminded people. If you need to chat, I'm all ears!
ReplyDeleteHi Donna. I too am alone. I understand your feelings. You are such a talented artist. I have admired your work for a long time. I hope you can find peace soon. I would like very much to be your friend.
ReplyDeleteIt seems I've been slapping a smile on my face forever. People think I'm happy when inside I'm just dying. I have to portray that happiness and be positive all the time or my business would fail. I should be an actress, I'd win a grammy.
ReplyDeleteYOu have your dogs... with pets one is never truly alone! I live on a small island in the middle of nowhere... we came from away (3000 miles) we will never be from here... we will always live in so and so's house even though it looks nothing like their house... I have lived in small communites for the last 35 years where I wasn't appreciated you just have to grow a thick skin and bury yourself in work!
ReplyDeleteI am a loner by nature and love my alone time, but I do not know how I would handle it if I was alone all the time. I hear the pain in your post and it really proves that while our cyber friends are a caring community that we can share with, they cannot fill that sad feeling within. I do hope that you can find a solution as your creative talent is so incredible.
ReplyDeleteDonna, what can I say? I'd say you need to get out of the house, but you don't seem to like where you are. I'm very familiar with the idea of feeling like you are not going to stay somewhere and therefore not becoming a part of what's going on. But I think it's a mistake. And if you've been somewhere for five years- even if it's not your favorite place- I think you need to find a way to get out there. You know there have to be others around who feel the same way. As far as Alaska- is there a reason you can't just go there? A way you can make it happen? It kind of seems that you have determined that that is what will make you happier. In which case, I think you need to find a way to do it NOW. I hope you don't mind all of this- I'm kind of worried about you.....
ReplyDeleteYou may be alone, but by reading the comments it sounds like you at least know who you are and what you want. That you are a strong person. That you have a sense of purpose. I believe that knowing yourself can be more important that knowing another, but I do hope you find what you are looking for.
ReplyDeleteI also live in a small community. It's very insular. I don't drive due to medical issues. I do have my husband but he works a lot. I find the internet to be a godsend since it does allow access to "conversation" with like minded people.
ReplyDeleteAnd the goats. Your dogs surely provide attention. I'm sure more than you want at time if I remember dogs :)
I'm sorry you are having down times.
I'm sorry you are sad Donna. I hope that things will change for you sooner rather than later. Sometimes it is lonely even when you are in the same room with somebody. I've experienced that and I think it worse than being alone. It is my hope that you can manage to find some sort of community even if only on the internet.
ReplyDelete~Ema
Thanks for the comments. I am a very private person, this took a lot for me to put out there. It's very difficult not having ANYONE in your life. I would love to find a companion so I could do things with someone. I long to hold hands with someone or just even feel another human touch or listen to another persons voice. Yeah, I have my dogs, they love unconditionally. Not the same as a human though. Regarding Alaska, t's not so easy to just pick up and move 3500 miles away. It cost 8 grand to do it last time. I do hope to move someplace within the next 2 years. Regarding "community" on the internet. I don't do that. I participate in no forums, use facebook mostly for promoting my work. The rest of the time I'm just working or doing something with my dogs. I'll be alright. I'm strong and I've survived many unpleasant life circumstances.
ReplyDeleteDonna - I get it and hope that you find a way to get the real Donna in tune with the public one. That might mean a move. It might mean meeting that companion. It might mean neither of those things. The journey must have some meaning though - or at least that's what I believe. I suspect your strength and this time is gaining you a lot of wisdom. Your work is showing your passion.
ReplyDelete